My sweet Willow went to the Rainbow Bridge

[k9Karen]

Traci, I think you made a lot of sense and everything you said is too true.

[Tina B and crew]

I appreciate all of you and your compassion and understanding. I feel like I've been suckerpunched in the stomach. I sit here dreading going to bed tonight, because I know she isn't there. We picked up her cremains today and they gave us a beautiful set of prints they made of her paws. I cried nearly all the way home holding the tiny urn against my body. God I miss her!

I did schedule an appointment with a therapist next week. After 3 human deaths and the loss of Willow in just over 4 months I'm really at the deep end. The funeral home we used also does a pet loss support group, so I'll likely go to it. I want to tell Willow's story and the more people who are willing to listen the more it helps me process it. I'm sure people are getting tired of it already and it's only been 2 days.

[k9Karen]

I'm glad you're going to see a therapist. Being around others in the support group who are going thru the same thing you are will help you feel more "normal". IF necessary, don't be embarrassed to contact your physician about antidepressants. I know many people who have been helped by them. Only an MD/DO psychiatrist can prescibe meds. Counselors are usually masters level or PhDs in psycology/psycotherapy, so they can't help with something like that.

Be patient with yourself. The sun will come out and you will get better.

[slvrwhispr]

Oh, Tina... I'm so, so sorry. I never met Willow, but Izzy is practically her twin, and I'd... I don't even know. There aren't any words. I was thinking about you all last night as Izzy did a lot of the things you say Willow would do and trying to imagine my life without her. I can't do it. I wish I could bring her back for you.

This will get better, I promise. Do go to that support group, and any time you want to tell a Willow story, you know we all love to listen. Today is the worst. Every day will be a little bit better, even if you don't notice. You're not alone.

[k9Karen]

I agree with Slvrwhispr, please post a Willow story or come here to let out your feelings and frustrations any time you want. We're here to listen. We all understand what you're going through and want to help. In a way, this is also a support group.

[Tina B and crew]

Oh Silver...thank you...yes, Izzy was Willow's twin, aside from the tail. Willow had the cutes little curly bob tail. That was one reason why I was so attracted to her. I remember the very first night I met her. It was at the vet office I fostered for and they needed someone to foster her and her kitten. They had given her the name Justine (her kitten was Cuz...we renamed him Fluffernutter and of course she became Willow after I adopted her) and I thought that just didn't fit! I knew when I first laid eyes on her she was suppose to be part of my life, there was something special about that cat. There was a connection between us from the beginning. She shared a part of my soul. That first night I met her she gave me pressies and was so sweet. It seems like yesterday. I never guessed that I would only have her for 8 years. That just doesn't seem right. I should have had more time with her.

The thing about Willow is that she epitomizes unconditional love and devotion. There was not a mean hair on her body. She would get frustrated with Chunk but she was never harsh. She never growled or hissed at the vet's office when they gave her shots or took blood, she was always sweet and would give pressies. When I'd go to kiss her on her head instead of ducking away like many of my cats have done she would bump her head into my lips. And when she curled up next to me she would scootch up so close as if she really wanted to connect herself to me. It's those touches that I miss the most...I ache to feel her warmth, to look into her eyes, to hear her purr, and to give her kitty kisses.

Urged on by her and my daddy's presence I went to Hospice today and signed up to volunteer. I'll start training in October and they have offered me bereavement services if I want to take them up on that. I'm still angry that she was taken from, still so very sad that I don't have her. I have caught myself putting food in her dish and even calling for her to come to me only to be disappointed that she isn't there. I wake up many times during the night to be greeted by emptiness. That's the worse part of my day, night and morning, the times we had our ritual of time together. But today I felt her presence with me when I was out and about, in places that she would never have been. It was clearly her presence surrounding me. It's not enough though, not yet....

[slvrwhispr]

Izzy does that EXACT same thing, with the head-butting when I kiss her head. I promise to give her some extra kisses, y'know, just because. I showed some pictures of Willow that you've posted here to DH... and read him some stories. He saw the resemblance, but more importantly, we both had some smiles and laughs looking at the pictures and seeing the similarities between our two girls. I've had a cranky day and was snappy at DH earlier, but that brought us together. Willow's love lives on. *HUGS*

Keep us posted on how the hospice volunteering goes. It sounds interesting, and I'm definitely interested in hearing about your experiences.

[Tambrey]

Sitting here at work wiping my own tears away...I am so sorry for your losses Tina & Cleo...

It is so hard....over the years I have laid many to rest...and will do many more times...and it never gets any easier....

[Tina B and crew]

I'm just tired of this darn aching knot in my stomach that won't go away...every time I think of her. Everyone keeps telling me to hold onto memories, I will because I treasure them like nothing else, but I'm tire of ONLY having memories to hold onto.

[Tina B and crew]

Oh...we are considering planting a curly Willow tree in her honor...because of her tail

http://images.google.com/images?sourcei ... 78&bih=569

And I'm thinking of getting her pawprint tattooed over my heart