Help with new cat.....Sorry for the length....
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Help with new cat.....Sorry for the length....
Hi Everyone,
This is my first post to this forum, but I am hoping someone can help me. Four months ago, my husband brought home a stray cat from work that the other cats were picking on. Immediately, she hopped out of the carrier, onto my bed and was asleep in 5 minutes. Needless, to say, I fell completely in love with her.
Two days later, I took her to be spayed, she was pregnant, so the spaying waited, she had 6 kittens, I found homes for all, and she was spayed two weeks ago.
Onto the problem, I have two other cats, both passive, and one super passive greyhound. She torments them. Seriously, stalks, chases, antagonizes, you name it she does it. It isn't getting any better and really is getting worse. I have no idea what to do. I have tried separating, introducing slowly, ignoring them, but nothing is working.
I'm not sure what to do. Sometimes, it's fine, right now all the doors are open in the house and no one is bothering anyone, but when they do scrap, it sounds awful. My 100lb greyhound literally shakes in his bones at the sight of this 8lb cat and I feel so bad. My other cats are at the point where they just plain out hiss if they see her and she walks around the house like she is the Queen of Sheba.
Of course, she is an absolute doll with me and I am so attached but I am worried that it will never get better and this just isn't fair to my other animals.
Any ideas or suggestions? I can't bear the thought of re-homing her and quite honestly, who wants a cat that is mean with other animals? So any and all comments are welcome!
Krista- Mommy to Lenny, Billy Bob, Alaska, and Friday.
This is my first post to this forum, but I am hoping someone can help me. Four months ago, my husband brought home a stray cat from work that the other cats were picking on. Immediately, she hopped out of the carrier, onto my bed and was asleep in 5 minutes. Needless, to say, I fell completely in love with her.
Two days later, I took her to be spayed, she was pregnant, so the spaying waited, she had 6 kittens, I found homes for all, and she was spayed two weeks ago.
Onto the problem, I have two other cats, both passive, and one super passive greyhound. She torments them. Seriously, stalks, chases, antagonizes, you name it she does it. It isn't getting any better and really is getting worse. I have no idea what to do. I have tried separating, introducing slowly, ignoring them, but nothing is working.
I'm not sure what to do. Sometimes, it's fine, right now all the doors are open in the house and no one is bothering anyone, but when they do scrap, it sounds awful. My 100lb greyhound literally shakes in his bones at the sight of this 8lb cat and I feel so bad. My other cats are at the point where they just plain out hiss if they see her and she walks around the house like she is the Queen of Sheba.
Of course, she is an absolute doll with me and I am so attached but I am worried that it will never get better and this just isn't fair to my other animals.
Any ideas or suggestions? I can't bear the thought of re-homing her and quite honestly, who wants a cat that is mean with other animals? So any and all comments are welcome!
Krista- Mommy to Lenny, Billy Bob, Alaska, and Friday.
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- Formerly mamaof4soon
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Re: Help with new cat.....Sorry for the length....
Good that you fixed her but was she tested for diseases and wormed ? Bringing a stray into a home with animals already there you are putting everyone of your animals at risk. I do hope they were tested and are vaccinated every year so later on you dont have to worry about finding out this cat brought something home.
It is not fair to any of your animals to take in a stray and shove it in their face and think all will be well. Did you introduce them slowly? You said the cat was brought home and put onto your bed and it fell asleep...Now the falling asleep might be all cute and stuff but wow taking a STRAY cat into your home not knowing anything about it is highly risky and you are lucky it didnt have rabies or something else. Always be careful and when taking in any animal that the ones you have at home are first and foremost your priority.
I dont have any suggestions for the this stray cat. Obviosly this was a ferral cat that scrapped a lot outside and is not going to get better with what you have tried of is doing. BUT i would recommend highly that youkeep the cats away and the dog away because your vet bill will be big if this cat really hurts one of them and it gets infected. Protect your animals and keep this cat away until you can find a solution or someone comes on here with other suggestions to try. I do understand that you dont want to get rid of kitty but your other animals havent done anything wrong and the stress they are going through is higher than you think. You are lucky they havent started peeing on things in retaliation towards you. Have you thought of maybe asking a friend with no other animals to have her? She just might be a one cat household. There are many people willing to have only one cat and that would help relieve the stress on that cat plus all of your other animals.
Just my thoughts good luck with this.
It is not fair to any of your animals to take in a stray and shove it in their face and think all will be well. Did you introduce them slowly? You said the cat was brought home and put onto your bed and it fell asleep...Now the falling asleep might be all cute and stuff but wow taking a STRAY cat into your home not knowing anything about it is highly risky and you are lucky it didnt have rabies or something else. Always be careful and when taking in any animal that the ones you have at home are first and foremost your priority.
I dont have any suggestions for the this stray cat. Obviosly this was a ferral cat that scrapped a lot outside and is not going to get better with what you have tried of is doing. BUT i would recommend highly that youkeep the cats away and the dog away because your vet bill will be big if this cat really hurts one of them and it gets infected. Protect your animals and keep this cat away until you can find a solution or someone comes on here with other suggestions to try. I do understand that you dont want to get rid of kitty but your other animals havent done anything wrong and the stress they are going through is higher than you think. You are lucky they havent started peeing on things in retaliation towards you. Have you thought of maybe asking a friend with no other animals to have her? She just might be a one cat household. There are many people willing to have only one cat and that would help relieve the stress on that cat plus all of your other animals.
Just my thoughts good luck with this.
Almost 7 years in remission from Graves disease and no meds!
Re: Help with new cat.....Sorry for the length....
Please describe that environment. How were the other cats "picking" on her? Was someone taking care of these cats?wholovesskunks wrote:Four months ago, my husband brought home a stray cat from work that the other cats were picking on.
How old is she, and how far along into pregnancy was she when determined pregnant? Assuming you were waiting for the kittens to be weaned, but why wasn't she spayed around the time the kittens were around 4-6 weeks of age? Didn't your vet recommend a specific time she should be spayed? Did your vet follow up on her care during her pregnancy, and did he test her for FELV/FIV, deworm, etc?and she was spayed two weeks ago.
During the time she was pregnant, then nursing, what was her environment like? Did you keep the other cats and the dog away from her when she was nursing, etc? Exactly how did you attempt to introduce them? The concern here is possibly a too fast introduction stage when she was pregnant/nursing, since her environment needed to be private, sheltered, quiet and calm. Regardless of her pregnancy, introducing a new cat into the environment with other pets takes time and alot of comittment.
After she delivered, how did she attend her newborns? Was she a good mother and attentive or did she attempt to neglect them? Was she able to support all 6 kittens? (i.e., sufficient milk supply, attention, etc). Did you have to bottle-feed them?
How did the other cats react to her during her pregnancy/delivery/nursing? How did they react to the kittens? Were the mother and kittens kept in a seperate area so the mother could have privacy and the kittens kept safe? How were the other cats/dog introduced to the kittens?
Again, how did you introduce them, and how much time did you devote to this task? How much time did you devote to individual attention to the other pets? What methods did you attempt with the new cat when she first started showing signs of agression? What was occuring in the environment at these instances?I have tried separating, introducing slowly, ignoring them, but nothing is working.
When was her last veterinary check-up? Has she been completely evaluated for underlying health issues? Has she been vaccinated accordingly?
She has been sort of thrust into an unfamiliar environment, being pregnant and stressed didn't help, nor I suspect, her previous environment. Nursing/raising 6 kittens was also a very stressful event for her, combined with 3 other unfamiliar pets. During pregnancy, many cats become very attached to their human person, and are demanding of love and attention. Seperation anxiety can also occur during weaning/when the kittens are removed from her (adopted out). Not having been spayed until recently probably also was stressful and her hormones were/are out of whack. You'll have to expect a couple or few more weeks for her hormones to regulate post-spaying. Hormonal imbalances can cause behavioral changes. So, put yourself in her place and understand the significant stress she has been under.
First things first, get her to your vet for a complete and thorough exam, including vaccinations/deworming as your vet advises, and make sure she is healthy.
Once your vet determines her overall health status, it sounds like you need to start over with the introductions amoung all the pets, and work more slowly. You have to implement effective methods for prohibiting agressive behavior. A squirt bottle, for example, combined with a verbal command "NO", is effective for most cats. A temporary time-out in another room at the exact time of the unwanted behavior is also effective for some cats, but you can only do this at the exact time you catch the pet in the act, not minutes or hours later. The temporary time out should only consist of about 5-10 minutes.
Likewise, you have to also give her individual attention/love/attention.
Another good method is working to create playtime activities where all the pets can share the same space and not feel threatened or apprehensive of one another. Involving them all together in playtime and activity (with your direct involvement and supervision) allows them to focus on something positive, as opposed to focusing directly on each other. With consistent times set for these activities, they learn to adapt more quickly and begin to look forward to the activities and playtime sessions. Individual attention for each pet should also be given.
Harmony amoung the pets isn't going to happen overnight, you have to expect time, and be committed to this. But, it CAN be done, in slow steps. Don't expect perfect results, but if you're comitted, it will work. Think and be creative, be attentive to each pet's individual needs, and oblige them. Your husband should also be 100% committed and working with you so that every routine is consistent.
Lastly, make sure you have two seperate feeding/sleeping/litterbox "stations" set up for the pets during the introduction period. If one or more pets is intimidated by another, this adds to the agressive behavior between them. The "stations" don't have to be in seperate rooms, but far enough apart in one space where the pets are comfortable in their every day routines (eating, sleeping, litterbox duties, etc). Then slowly, over the course of several days or weeks, move the second station to the first commonly shared area. (although the cats' food/water dishes and litterboxes should NOT be accessible to the dog). Make sure there are enough litterboxes in the home, ideally one per cat, and keep them scooped daily and thoroughly cleaned and rinsed on a weekly basis. Also make sure the pets have safe havens to retreat to when spats occur (like a favorite room or area they are most comfortable in). You do not want any pet to be withdrawn and depressed, due to the behavior of another, but you want to ensure all the pets have an area they are most comfortable in.
Don't give up on your new kitty, she's been through an awful lot of stress and you just have to back up, take slow steps, and once you get through one step, move on to another step, keeping all of the pets' needs met.
..........Traci
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Re: Help with new cat.....Sorry for the length....
Well, I guess to start, she was immediately tested for FeLV/FIV, that was my biggest concern, worms, etc.... everything was a-ok, it was pregnancy I wasn't expecting. When she came home and slept on my bed, it was because I was quarantining her from the animals before she could be tested. The next day was when we went in for the full-exam and found out she was pregnant, she was about half way done. I have mostly kept her away from the other animals throughout the pregnancy and while nursing because she was so testy but with three kids, sometimes she would manage to get past the door if it wasn't totally clicked closed.
She was young when we got her, the vet guessed 6-9 months old, first litter. She had defintely been in a home before, and we think she was awful during her first heat, she had a heat after the kittens and boy is she vocal. I had to wait to have her spayed until she was done lactacting per the vet, the second she was done, she went in, it was exactly 2 weeks after the last kitten left and they all left between 7-8 weeks. As a mother, she was amazing, just great, not one problem at all.
As to my other cats, they could have cared less. And as once they hit around 6 weeks, they too would sneak out of my bedroom, my other cats are seriously awesome, they would never even look their way and they would be chasing after them and they just would ignore them.
She has never seemed stressed, obviously, she must have been, but she has always been little miss alpha. All of my cats, including her, are fully up to date on shots.
I really don't believe her to be feral, I am pretty positive she was in a home and dumped by my husband's work which is very industrial. The other cats weren't "owned" by anyone, but the owner's of his company did have them spayed/neutered, and up to date on shots, there is a low-cost clinic across the street. I'm not really sure how she was being picked on, I just know she took a liking to my husband, and he felt bad and brought her home. Trust me, this is the first (and last) time this has ever happened. I have never even owned an unneutered/unspayed pet, but she is now fully part of this family.
At times they are all fine, and at other times, they scrap. She is tiny compared to my others and trust me, the others hold their own. She has claws, but I have soft paws on them, and my other cats are front-declawed (adopted from SPCA that way).
As to the litter boxes, I have three, 1 in my room, that's her's only, and two out on the enclosed pool deck. She has absolutely no desire to go on the pool deck or outside, she is terrified of the outdoors and followed me out one day not realizing it was the front porch and frantically ran back in.
Thank you for the responses. My other animals don't seem stressed and neither does she, I just feel bad when they do the low growling thing or I hear them scrap, of course, I immediately yell at them and separate them and they all look at me like I'm nuts.
We also leave occasionally for an hour or so, no one is ever locked up and they all seem fine when we are gone. It may be a territorial issue as well, since mainly it's when I'm around or they are all wanting to sleep on my bed. I try and keep Friday, the female, with me, but she teases the others underneath the door with her cute pink nails.
I haven't heard or seen any scrapping tonight and they are all out and about, so that's a good sign!
Thanks again!
Krista
She was young when we got her, the vet guessed 6-9 months old, first litter. She had defintely been in a home before, and we think she was awful during her first heat, she had a heat after the kittens and boy is she vocal. I had to wait to have her spayed until she was done lactacting per the vet, the second she was done, she went in, it was exactly 2 weeks after the last kitten left and they all left between 7-8 weeks. As a mother, she was amazing, just great, not one problem at all.
As to my other cats, they could have cared less. And as once they hit around 6 weeks, they too would sneak out of my bedroom, my other cats are seriously awesome, they would never even look their way and they would be chasing after them and they just would ignore them.
She has never seemed stressed, obviously, she must have been, but she has always been little miss alpha. All of my cats, including her, are fully up to date on shots.
I really don't believe her to be feral, I am pretty positive she was in a home and dumped by my husband's work which is very industrial. The other cats weren't "owned" by anyone, but the owner's of his company did have them spayed/neutered, and up to date on shots, there is a low-cost clinic across the street. I'm not really sure how she was being picked on, I just know she took a liking to my husband, and he felt bad and brought her home. Trust me, this is the first (and last) time this has ever happened. I have never even owned an unneutered/unspayed pet, but she is now fully part of this family.
At times they are all fine, and at other times, they scrap. She is tiny compared to my others and trust me, the others hold their own. She has claws, but I have soft paws on them, and my other cats are front-declawed (adopted from SPCA that way).
As to the litter boxes, I have three, 1 in my room, that's her's only, and two out on the enclosed pool deck. She has absolutely no desire to go on the pool deck or outside, she is terrified of the outdoors and followed me out one day not realizing it was the front porch and frantically ran back in.
Thank you for the responses. My other animals don't seem stressed and neither does she, I just feel bad when they do the low growling thing or I hear them scrap, of course, I immediately yell at them and separate them and they all look at me like I'm nuts.
We also leave occasionally for an hour or so, no one is ever locked up and they all seem fine when we are gone. It may be a territorial issue as well, since mainly it's when I'm around or they are all wanting to sleep on my bed. I try and keep Friday, the female, with me, but she teases the others underneath the door with her cute pink nails.
I haven't heard or seen any scrapping tonight and they are all out and about, so that's a good sign!
Thanks again!
Krista
Re: Help with new cat.....Sorry for the length....
I definitely agree the cat doesn't sound feral to me. A feral cat doesn't just instantly love and trust a person. That's a cat who's had contact with humans before, most likely through ownership.
She was possibly dumped the second the previous owner found out she was pregnant. It happens way too often. It makes me sad.
She's very lucky she found someone who was willing to keep her and responsibly take care of the kittens.
Traci's advice is always good. I also like the little point; "Don't expect perfect results."
It's pretty rare for any cats to get along ALL the time. My boys have been together for years and play all sweetly and then suddenly someone will annoy someone else and there will be some ROWR FFFT every now and then. Haha.
It doesn't sound like this is a seriously dangerous anger situation to me. You don't seem to be concerned that the animals are getting harmed by each other. Of course, it can always happen unexpectedly... But if this is just the usual hiss swat run away sort of fighting, it's definitely worth trying to work through it.
Some cats are naturally aggressive and she may always insist on being the dominant animal... But some peace can probably be acheived if you work at it.
I especially like the usual plan of "tricking" the cats into getting along by distracting them with play and slow integration. :P
She was possibly dumped the second the previous owner found out she was pregnant. It happens way too often. It makes me sad.
She's very lucky she found someone who was willing to keep her and responsibly take care of the kittens.
Traci's advice is always good. I also like the little point; "Don't expect perfect results."
It's pretty rare for any cats to get along ALL the time. My boys have been together for years and play all sweetly and then suddenly someone will annoy someone else and there will be some ROWR FFFT every now and then. Haha.
It doesn't sound like this is a seriously dangerous anger situation to me. You don't seem to be concerned that the animals are getting harmed by each other. Of course, it can always happen unexpectedly... But if this is just the usual hiss swat run away sort of fighting, it's definitely worth trying to work through it.
Some cats are naturally aggressive and she may always insist on being the dominant animal... But some peace can probably be acheived if you work at it.
I especially like the usual plan of "tricking" the cats into getting along by distracting them with play and slow integration. :P
Re: Help with new cat.....Sorry for the length....
Maybe you could clarify a bit further. Your first post indicated you were very concerned about her behavior, yet your second post indicates you are not overly-concerned. You first said she terrorizes your other pets, yet you then say at times they are all fine.
Exactly how often does the behavior occur?
In any event, try the suggestions made above, and take the steps slowly, be committed to the task. Don't just yell at them and seperate them, that is defeating the purpose and is counterproductive.
Are any of the cats allowed outdoors? If so, please, Indoors ONLY.
Exactly how often does the behavior occur?
In any event, try the suggestions made above, and take the steps slowly, be committed to the task. Don't just yell at them and seperate them, that is defeating the purpose and is counterproductive.
Are any of the cats allowed outdoors? If so, please, Indoors ONLY.
..........Traci
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Re: Help with new cat.....Sorry for the length....
That's exactly what I mean. It has pretty much been going on like this since we got her and that's what makes me concerned. I have never had issues with pets getting along so this is a new thing for us. She likes to stalk and tease the other cats but at times, it's as though she wants to be friends, they get too close, and the scrapping starts. Or, my one cat, Alaska, hisses whenever he sees her because she will eventually run after him. I want to say that it sounds much worse than it is, since it sounds terrible, yet no one has been hurt.Maybe you could clarify a bit further. Your first post indicated you were very concerned about her behavior, yet your second post indicates you are not overly-concerned. You first said she terrorizes your other pets, yet you then say at times they are all fine.
I want to say a few times a day, more during the night, which is of course when I'm trying to sleep and notice them.Exactly how often does the behavior occur?
Nope. They are all indoor cats.Are any of the cats allowed outdoors?
Tonight has been pretty good so far, hopefully, it will last!
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- Formerly mamaof4soon
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Re: Help with new cat.....Sorry for the length....
I have to ask this....Are you sure they are not just playing? I ask because I have two West German Shepherd dogs that when put together sound as though they are tearing each other apart yet they are playing and never even put a scratch on the other. But to an outsider it sounds just awful.
I had two cats Male and a Female and they were both fixed when 6months old. They would run around that house like nobodies business scrappin and man did dad hate that. We as kids just giggled about it. Once in a while we would here the female screatchin Oh Good Lord it was like Satan opened up the fiery gates of hell and my female is what came out! I kid you not.
But they were playing. I must say though that my two cats did sleep together and cuddle.
I'm not sure what to think of this that you say. Seems that Friday(love the name) is picky and not sure how to guide you on this one.
BUT i did want to say KUDOS for taking in a stray that sort of brought herself to you. I always feel that when a female cat attaches itself to someone it is because that someone is a good person and cats and dogs know this. So that says HUGE things about your dh! You not only took her in, you chose to take care of her and let her be the mother she was supposed to be.(thank you) You chose to find good homes for her kittens after the right amount of weening and your cats and her are fully up to date and fixed. Wow ! I just had to commend you for this.
Glad that you acted the way this mamacat prayed you would. Thank you to you and your dh.
I had two cats Male and a Female and they were both fixed when 6months old. They would run around that house like nobodies business scrappin and man did dad hate that. We as kids just giggled about it. Once in a while we would here the female screatchin Oh Good Lord it was like Satan opened up the fiery gates of hell and my female is what came out! I kid you not.
But they were playing. I must say though that my two cats did sleep together and cuddle.
I'm not sure what to think of this that you say. Seems that Friday(love the name) is picky and not sure how to guide you on this one.
BUT i did want to say KUDOS for taking in a stray that sort of brought herself to you. I always feel that when a female cat attaches itself to someone it is because that someone is a good person and cats and dogs know this. So that says HUGE things about your dh! You not only took her in, you chose to take care of her and let her be the mother she was supposed to be.(thank you) You chose to find good homes for her kittens after the right amount of weening and your cats and her are fully up to date and fixed. Wow ! I just had to commend you for this.
Glad that you acted the way this mamacat prayed you would. Thank you to you and your dh.
Almost 7 years in remission from Graves disease and no meds!