New Kitten timid and hiding! Please help!

[E's]

Sorry to hear, but all is not lost! I had written the post below earlier but my session had timed out... read it anyway and try to stay calm. Remember:
Food* is the great "bonding" ingredient. Leave the water and only a small amount of dry kitten chow in the room for several hours. Then, at a time of day or evening when you would ordinarily be interacting with your cat, open something really yummy - a can of "people-grade" tuna is good - put some on your hands, go into the kitty's room with the can and (separately) an empty food dish. Sit on the floor with the dish in front of you and the container of tuna or whatever in your hands... and quietly do nothing but think "Hum hum tra la... here I am all by myself enjoying this good food..." Meditate..

Wait at least 10 or 15 minutes. If kitten does come out to investigate, stay very quiet, try to have her sniff at your fingers... then put a small amount of the food into the dish, then - as quietly and unhurriedly as possible - get up and go out of the room. If the kitten does not respond but you know she is aware of your presence, do the same: put a spoonful or so of food in the dish and go quietly out of the room.

This procedure may have to be repeated several times (and no, you are not going to let tuna be your cat's regular diet !) but eventually association will cause the kitten to accept her new human(s) as the provider(s) - which is bonding.

Do NOT use this same procedure for entrapment... when you must take the kitten to the vet, for example: as you follow Traci's instructions re vet care, try to keep such events as having to place kitten in the carrier as far apart in time as possible from the quiet bonding sessions. (But it is OK to put a little butter or oleo or cream on the paws to help kitty stay calm in stressful situations.)

Good luck to you - remember to have fun as you go along!

E's
Austin, Texas

[MJ]

Well, she had a pretty terrible experience... And if it's only been a day or a few days, I'm not surprised if there's been little improvement...

My own boys, who were always outgoing and loving and happy, got like this after we moved. They lived in the same place for most of their lives, and then moving pretty much put them in "I hate everything in the world" mode. One of them soils himself whenever he's taken anywhere in a carrier, (which makes vet visits fun) and howls so much he makes the other one more nervous...

And once we finally let them out in the new apartment, they ran and hid under the bowl of the toilet. Which isn't even a good hiding place. But they sat under there and acted like we were evil nasty strangers for the better part of a week. Other than eating and drinking and pottying, of course. Our bathroom is pretty small too, but we did manage with the food and water and litter in there for a while.

The main problem is that they were even more terrified whenever we flushed the toilet. Hahaha poor babies.

They got over it in the end though... And then they were as happy as you please to have a new place to live. :P

So yeah, I mean... When cats that have known you for a very long time can get like that, a cat that doesn't know you at all can naturally be especially terrified...

The fact that when you first met her and she purred and was friendly is good, it means she's not just feral or hopeless... Just very very scared.

Traci's idea of blocking off places she can hide is a good one, but I know from experience, and what you said, that it's not always entirely possible... Cats are so nutty about finding a way to hide SOMEWHERE. So I personally would say, yeah, if she HAS to hide, let her hide somewhere a little more roomy and comfortable... Which, depending on its design, the couch may not be a bad choice. But Traci may have some more ideas.

I do think laying on the floor is a VERY good way to make yourself less threatening to a cat. I also think, while talking to them gently and trying to get their attention consistently is good... I've found a lot of success with IGNORING the cat too. Not for long periods of time, and not truly ignoring them... Just pretending to now and then.

One of my favorite methods is laying on the floor and pretending to take a nap or otherwise totally ignoring the cat. That usually leads to my head being sniffed pretty quickly, they have trouble resisting the urge to check stuff like that out. :P

Also, try not to be upset yet... This is only the beginning. And of course, if she picks up on your feelings, she's only going to feel worse. I think cats are emotional sponges sometimes.

[kitalooclef]

Thanks for the support everyone. I cleared the space around her of pillows/blankets so she has a large space if she'd like to stay under the couch. When I'm less upset I'll go in and lay on the floor and try to talk to her, perhaps try the tuna thing. I really appreciate all the help, I'm sure I sound like a crazy person, I just feel so bad for her and consequently feels like a bad person for not knowing what to do and not being able to comfort her! At least if she's under the couch, I can see her, whereas before I couldn't see her at all. I still can't get close enough to check her incision but hopefully that will come soon. Oh Traci- yes, they are dissolvable stitches. Thanks again everyone!

[kitalooclef]

I tried laying on the floor for a while. When I went in, she had moved over out of site, so I cleared a new space, and then while I was on the floor, she moved out of sight again. As far as I know she made no move to come and see what I was doing. She seems to not want to be within sight at all, which I guess would explain why she's not interested in the carrier.

[Traci]

MJ has the idea, and yes MJ, I do it too

You're maybe trying too hard, but that's NOT a bad thing, it simply means you care and want for her safety and well being.

How about really taking a nap on the floor near her? I've done this before, and as MJ says, even pretending to sleep works sometimes. The key is the period of time you devote to this. 5 or 10 minutes at a time probably isn't enough. I've been known (and I'm sure others here too!) to lay on the floor for hours at a time if it means getting the attention of a tiny little furball to come out and at least acknowledge her surroundings. Lay facing her (but from a slight distance) and simply blink your eyes slowly, eye contact in this way helps them to feel less threatened. (and in cat language, slow blinks of the eyes is a sign of contentment)

E's idea of canned tuna is also a good idea, at least temporarily to get her attention to food. Or even canned kitten food might be appealing to her (you should be feeding kitten food anyway, but if she's eating dry kitten food, tempt her with canned kitten food and vice versa)

For now, leave her be, and try laying on the floor nearby so she can see you and so that you can see her. Try for at least 20 minutes (cats are very patient critters, she could lay there all day and not come out, but she WILL watch you, and will determine from your body language when she thinks it's safe to slowly venture out.) And again, keep reassuring her in a soothing voice. Calm and quiet is best, however.

I think the less pillows/blankets to block off access UNDER furniture is best, unless you have them placed where you can visually see her where she hides. I just wanted to suggest blocking off the bookcase for now because this is an item of furniture that would be difficult for you to get access to her. She does need a place to hide, and I suggested the carrier because it would be comfy, a bit dark inside, and confined which cats love when they hide. It may be too out in the open however, which is probably why she chose to hind under the couch. Either way, you just have to ensure that you can SEE her wherever she hides.

[kitalooclef]

I may try napping on the floor this weekend if possible. I offered her a peace offering; I put two treats halfway under the couch, and she seems to have eaten them when I went out of the room, so now she knows I am a purveyor of yummy things We will keep reading/etc. in the room so she at least gets used to our presence.

I kept one area blocked off in addition to the bookshelf, and I left a pillow that was right in front of her. It'll be interesting to see how/if she moves around. Has anyone had good experiences with those polyester fiber cat mats? They're usually white and sold under names like "Cat Attractor" and such. I have one in the carrier, but maybe I should just leave it on the floor.

The food in her dish is getting low, so once she eats most of it I may try more timed feedings to see if I can get her to come around. She hasn't yet gone poo in the litter box, should I be concerned, or is that normal? She's definitely been in it though, so she knows where it is and she has been eating. Thanks again everyone!

[Traci]

Don't let the food or water dish get too low or empty....she's a kitten and needs to have food available to her, especially once she starts expending her energy.

It's good she ate the treats, this is a good sign. She's most likely hungry, so if you have other things to do at this point, leave the room and do them. Check on her in about a half hour and see if she's come out to eat.

Depending on when exactly you got her, you should probably find out from the shelter (if possible) when her last stool was. Ideally she should eliminate once or twice daily. It wouldn't be unusual for her to not go in a day, but by tomorrow, you want to see stool production!

[mamabear]

I feel the same, I have been known as well to sleep in a room with a feral cat on occasion. (yes i know I shouldnt have but I was young and stupid) lol

She will trust you eventually, Please dont think we find you odd, we have all been there done that and then some. Trying to figure it out is the worst feeling because you feel helpless and feel like you are doing so many things so wrong. Its ok kitty will get over it eventually and you will be sending us notes saying she is running a muck and what do you do now..!!!! LOL

I have to ask this...do you work in a dr's office or dentists office, somewhere that is any dr or Vet of any kind? I ask because THAT WILL offend a kitty and that "smell" means danger to them for the most part. It means put up my guard. So if you do work for a place like that then maybe take a shower before you go in there, at least change your clothes and wash hands well. It might help.

The fact that she was sweet with you at the adoption center is a good sign. she will be that way again, timidness can be overcome with love and patience which is everything you have so good luck dear and let us know.

[kitalooclef]

I scooped out her litter box, and she did go poo, so that's great. I laid on the floor in the living room half-dosing for about an hour. She didn't do anything, but maybe if it's routine she'll warm up. She's had a stressful day. I put a treat in the middle of her cat bed to see if she investigates it overnight. We'll see!

[kitalooclef]

Mamabear, I'm just a lowly graduate student, so no offending smells from work. My hubby is a med student, but he's not spending time in hospitals/clinics yet, so there shouldn't be a smell issue. Just lots of love!