1) My three boys play really rough with each other. They don't have any aggression to each other when they are not playing. There is no growling, hissing, etc. And they all curl up and sleep together. But when they play, they really go at it and bite on each other and stuff.
Captain Hook (and occasionally one of the others) ends up with scabs on the back of his neck from where somebody has either bit or scratched him. The scabs don't seem to bother him, and he doesn't mess with them. They heal up just fine and fall off until the next time things get too rough.
Is it usual for them to be this rough when they are just playing? If it's not, how can I get them to stop?
Of note is the complicating factor that Captain Hook is a total scaredy cat and I can't yell at any of the other cats when he's around because he thinks he's getting yelled and and will run away and hide. He runs away when Pat scratches the couch because he knows that Pat is going to get yelled at...
2) Also, this might be related... Pat has taken to nibbling on strangers. He doesn't bite hard, but he likes to nibble when they try to pet him. He rarely does this to me, and whenever he tries it with me I immediately stop petting him. But strangers can hardly ever pet him, because as soon as they reach out their hand to touch his head, he's there trying to nibble them. Do I just need to get one of those "Attack cat on duty" signs? Is there any hope that my roommate will one day be able to pet Pat without getting nibbled?
My boys play rough! (2 possibly related questions)
Re: My boys play rough! (2 possibly related questions)
Does either one sulk or withdraw immediately after playing, or is unusually submissive to the other during these play fights? Is there any squealing, crying out? Is blood drawn? If any of the above, it may not be play fighting but an attack. Since you said they are otherwise bonded, it doesn't sound like attacking, but males can indeed get rather rough with each other, even during innocent play.
Have you been yelling at Pat alot? Other than that, has there been any other changes in the environment to have caused the sudden, unusual nibbling behavior? Describe nibbling, it is only nibbling, or is he actually putting teeth into skin?
You said you discourage him nibbling on you, so if this is something you are not comfortable with, chances are, your guests won't be either. Simply tell them to be cautious around him because he has a tendency to nibble. If he is in fact biting, be honest and tell your guests that he is a biter and it is best they do not handle him.
Have you been yelling at Pat alot? Other than that, has there been any other changes in the environment to have caused the sudden, unusual nibbling behavior? Describe nibbling, it is only nibbling, or is he actually putting teeth into skin?
You said you discourage him nibbling on you, so if this is something you are not comfortable with, chances are, your guests won't be either. Simply tell them to be cautious around him because he has a tendency to nibble. If he is in fact biting, be honest and tell your guests that he is a biter and it is best they do not handle him.
..........Traci
Re: My boys play rough! (2 possibly related questions)
When they play, they make noises, but they are normal playing noises, and nothing like cat fight noises. One will go after another, and bite on his neck, and stuff, then they chase for a while, then the other one will be going at it. And they'll sit right there, eying each other, flicking their tails, just waiting for the other one to jump on them. It's definitely a mutual "attack." In fact, Captain Hook is more often than not the one that starts it, even if he does end up physically being the loser.
I generally don't bother yelling at Pat, since he doesn't listen anyway. I've just sort of given up. The only thing that I try to keep after him about is I squirt him with the water bottle when he scratches the couch. And he knows that he's not supposed to do that. He watches me while he's scratching the couch and starts to run when he sees me reach for the bottle. But he doesn't seem to feel too put-out by me disciplining him for that, because he also follows me from room to room, sits on the bathroom counter when I'm brushing my teeth, and wakes me up every morning when my alarm goes off.
When he nibbles, he opens his mouth and bites, but it's not a hard bite at all. Nowhere near close to breaking the skin, and it doesn't even hurt. But it's still not polite, and most people aren't comfortable with a cat that's doing that because they don't know that he's not going to just chomp down and bite them. (The only time that he's ever broken skin on anybody was 2 years ago, he bit my dad when we were putting softpaws on him, and that was an entirely different situation...)
I discourage him nibbling on me because I just don't think it's a good behavior for him to have. Unfortunately, it's just gotten him to the point where he rarely nibbles me, but he thinks that everybody else is fair game.
He'll come up to me and I'll just reach over and pet him and nothing happens at all.
But with my roommate (and pretty much anybody else, although not my parents so much when they come to visit, so I guess it's mostly strangers), he will walk up to them, meow at them, and give them the sweetest and most endearing look. And then they reach their hand out to pet him on the head, and he maneuvers around to nibble on them instead. But he's always going right up to them and talking, making the impression that he'd really love for them to pet him.
Could this be some sort of stranger anxiety? Or is he being territorial? Maybe he's not a super-friendly cat, running up to anybody that comes into the house, but he really is an attack cat...?
I have told my roommate that she has absolutely no obligation to pet him, especially if he starts nibbling on her, but that he is harmless.
I'm not sure it's really been a sudden behavior. He was doing it with my last roommate as well. So it's been almost a year... I didn't notice it when I was in Arizona. Then I moved to Michigan and was living alone for a while. Then in December I moved again and got a roommate, which is when she started having issues. Just this past month the old roommate left and I got a new one, who is having the same issues, as is pretty much anybody else who comes over.
I might add that both roommates have never lived with cats before. So maybe it has to do with their inexperience and his ability to sense that they don't quite know what they are doing?
I generally don't bother yelling at Pat, since he doesn't listen anyway. I've just sort of given up. The only thing that I try to keep after him about is I squirt him with the water bottle when he scratches the couch. And he knows that he's not supposed to do that. He watches me while he's scratching the couch and starts to run when he sees me reach for the bottle. But he doesn't seem to feel too put-out by me disciplining him for that, because he also follows me from room to room, sits on the bathroom counter when I'm brushing my teeth, and wakes me up every morning when my alarm goes off.
When he nibbles, he opens his mouth and bites, but it's not a hard bite at all. Nowhere near close to breaking the skin, and it doesn't even hurt. But it's still not polite, and most people aren't comfortable with a cat that's doing that because they don't know that he's not going to just chomp down and bite them. (The only time that he's ever broken skin on anybody was 2 years ago, he bit my dad when we were putting softpaws on him, and that was an entirely different situation...)
I discourage him nibbling on me because I just don't think it's a good behavior for him to have. Unfortunately, it's just gotten him to the point where he rarely nibbles me, but he thinks that everybody else is fair game.
He'll come up to me and I'll just reach over and pet him and nothing happens at all. But with my roommate (and pretty much anybody else, although not my parents so much when they come to visit, so I guess it's mostly strangers), he will walk up to them, meow at them, and give them the sweetest and most endearing look. And then they reach their hand out to pet him on the head, and he maneuvers around to nibble on them instead. But he's always going right up to them and talking, making the impression that he'd really love for them to pet him.
Could this be some sort of stranger anxiety? Or is he being territorial? Maybe he's not a super-friendly cat, running up to anybody that comes into the house, but he really is an attack cat...?
I have told my roommate that she has absolutely no obligation to pet him, especially if he starts nibbling on her, but that he is harmless.
I'm not sure it's really been a sudden behavior. He was doing it with my last roommate as well. So it's been almost a year... I didn't notice it when I was in Arizona. Then I moved to Michigan and was living alone for a while. Then in December I moved again and got a roommate, which is when she started having issues. Just this past month the old roommate left and I got a new one, who is having the same issues, as is pretty much anybody else who comes over.
I might add that both roommates have never lived with cats before. So maybe it has to do with their inexperience and his ability to sense that they don't quite know what they are doing?
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Auntie Debbie
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Re: My boys play rough! (2 possibly related questions)
The biting sounds more like "love bites" some cats will give sometimes. I have three that do this on a regular basis, one (ex-feral who did even while feral). As long as the ears aren't turned back, growling, scratching or biting hard, it's a cats attempt at affection much like a human would kiss. If you're really not comfortable with it, you can discourage it, but you may also be discouraging other forms of affection. Try petting him instead and when he goes to nibble, just move your hand somewhere where he can't reach it.
As for the fighting, even if it is play-fighting, it sounds like they are just playfighting, but yes very rough. It could be that they are really don't have any real issues with each other, but may be trying to grap the alpha spot. Usually when there are real issues or a real fight is happening, you will hear the snarls, hisses, growls followed by real combat or flight by the more submissive cat. Keep an eye on that. I have two littermates that usually get along, but lately the male will corner the female. You'd think Armmegeddon (sp) was going on. What I find is the male hovering over the female playing the "I'm not touching you game". No combat, just harrassment.
Hope it remains playing fighting and love bites!
As for the fighting, even if it is play-fighting, it sounds like they are just playfighting, but yes very rough. It could be that they are really don't have any real issues with each other, but may be trying to grap the alpha spot. Usually when there are real issues or a real fight is happening, you will hear the snarls, hisses, growls followed by real combat or flight by the more submissive cat. Keep an eye on that. I have two littermates that usually get along, but lately the male will corner the female. You'd think Armmegeddon (sp) was going on. What I find is the male hovering over the female playing the "I'm not touching you game". No combat, just harrassment.
Hope it remains playing fighting and love bites!
Kitty kisses,
Debbie
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"Those we shelter on earth will be our treasures in Heaven." Victor Hugo, I think
Debbie
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"Those we shelter on earth will be our treasures in Heaven." Victor Hugo, I think
Re: My boys play rough! (2 possibly related questions)
With my boys, they like each other reasonably well and do play together nicely sometimes... But I think the younger one is much stronger (and is, of course, much BIGGER) and doesn't really know his own strength. He tends to bite a little too hard when playing and makes the older cat mad sometimes. Then there will be some growling and they'll split apart and whip tails at each other for a while... But I've never seen any wounds on either of them.
Sometimes I also think one cat wants to play more often or for longer than the other cat, and that also leads to irritation. It must be kind of frustrating to have someone pouncing on your head and chewing on you if you're not in the mood. Hehehe.
The nibbling thing is interesting, and actually sounds kind of cute to me. Haha. But I definitely can't say much about why he does it. I guess it could be an affection/comfort thing, yeah. When I got my older cat, he was a stray kitten we found in the road... And he started nibbling on my hands a lot that day when he decided I wasn't going to eat him.
At least your cat doesn't do what my younger boy does... He's the sweetest, cutest, most innocent looking thing... Until my guests pet him. And then he likes it, and he's sweet... And then he attacks and draws blood. Of course, my mom has thin skin and bleeds easily, but it still sucks. Weirdo cat. He seems to like her, but he still can't resist biting her whenever he sees her. He's learned not to bite me hard any more, but he used to always chomp on me too.
Once he was also in my mom's lap, purring and being sweet... And then slowly climbed up and put his paws around her neck and went for the vampire bite. XD
He's always just been the most aggressive little brat. Truthfully, I suspect it was because he was taken away from his mother way too early. He was a kitten in a box outside of Walmart adoption... I knew he was too young, but I thought he'd be better off with me than someone else, and I wanted him anyway. :P
So yeah, maybe Pat is naturally aggressive... Not necessarily MEAN aggressive, just sort of... Rough around the edges. Haha.
Sometimes I also think one cat wants to play more often or for longer than the other cat, and that also leads to irritation. It must be kind of frustrating to have someone pouncing on your head and chewing on you if you're not in the mood. Hehehe.
The nibbling thing is interesting, and actually sounds kind of cute to me. Haha. But I definitely can't say much about why he does it. I guess it could be an affection/comfort thing, yeah. When I got my older cat, he was a stray kitten we found in the road... And he started nibbling on my hands a lot that day when he decided I wasn't going to eat him.
At least your cat doesn't do what my younger boy does... He's the sweetest, cutest, most innocent looking thing... Until my guests pet him. And then he likes it, and he's sweet... And then he attacks and draws blood. Of course, my mom has thin skin and bleeds easily, but it still sucks. Weirdo cat. He seems to like her, but he still can't resist biting her whenever he sees her. He's learned not to bite me hard any more, but he used to always chomp on me too.
Once he was also in my mom's lap, purring and being sweet... And then slowly climbed up and put his paws around her neck and went for the vampire bite. XD
He's always just been the most aggressive little brat. Truthfully, I suspect it was because he was taken away from his mother way too early. He was a kitten in a box outside of Walmart adoption... I knew he was too young, but I thought he'd be better off with me than someone else, and I wanted him anyway. :P
So yeah, maybe Pat is naturally aggressive... Not necessarily MEAN aggressive, just sort of... Rough around the edges. Haha.
Re: My boys play rough! (2 possibly related questions)
Instruct the roommate to only hold her hand out, palm side up, and at Pat's eye level, and then allow Pat to smell her hand first, to establish if he wants her to pet him or not. Some cats will NOT allow petting if the person automatically starts petting the head or other part of the body without letting the CAT investigate the person first. It could also be the manner in which she approaches him, or the manner in which she pets him. Also make sure she isn't wearing scented lotions, perfumes, etc.
The nibbling behavior isn't that distracting, and you shouldn't concentrate on it unnecessarily. Cats don't know what "polite" is according to their human's desire, so as long as he isn't hurting anyone, I'd just chalk it up to his personality.
The nibbling behavior isn't that distracting, and you shouldn't concentrate on it unnecessarily. Cats don't know what "polite" is according to their human's desire, so as long as he isn't hurting anyone, I'd just chalk it up to his personality.
..........Traci
Re: My boys play rough! (2 possibly related questions)
Okay.... so lessons on how to pet Pat the cat... 
I'll let you know how it goes. My roommate is still in the process of moving in, so she was here for a week and now she's gone for a week and a half. But when she gets back, we'll try it.
Right now, Pat is helping me type this by sitting across my arm.
I'll let you know how it goes. My roommate is still in the process of moving in, so she was here for a week and now she's gone for a week and a half. But when she gets back, we'll try it. Right now, Pat is helping me type this by sitting across my arm.