Missing and remembering Kujo

[JUDY S]

He came to me as a ruly two year old. He had already had at least two other homes before mine. He hadn't been taught much, but was friendly and not at all aggressive. Before Kujo I didn't know that german shepherds could be white, I thought he was beautiful.

I had moments where I wondered what I had gotten myself into. Times when I had to wait for half an hour while he decided it was time to come to me at the end of a walk. Times when he would not be quiet no matter what I did. In fact, I moved out of my parents home because my father said the dog had to go and he wasn't leaving without me.

Over time Kuj realized that I was there for him and I wasn't going anywhere. He learned to listen and obey me for the most part, except when he was loose and there was something fast to chase. We never did conquer that one.

We have so many memories together and yet not enough. Monday, May 21, 2007 my husband went to feed the kids and Kujo did not come in. Pete was calling for him and I thought he had managed to get out of the fence again. I wish he had. My baby was laying on the grass in the back yard, gone. There was not a mark on him. He spent the day before playing with the other two dogs, there was no change in at all in his behavior. My vet says it's possible that he had a heart attack, at nine years he is apparently considered a senior.

I was not ready for this, I would never have been ready. I take comfort in knowing that he was not suffering, and that I didn't have to make that awful decision to put him down. I am finding it hard to accept that I don't have any more time with him, he didn't seem old. Kujo, I love you and I already miss you so much.

[Marty]

Judy, I am so sorry for the loss of Kujo. He knew he was loved by you and I wish him peace running at the bridge. Hugs to you and your family as you struggle with this.

[Traci]

Judy, I am so very sorry, my heart breaks for you. I hope you can find comfort in knowing that he knew yours was his forever home and he knew how much he was loved....

Safe and gentle journey, sweet Kujo......(((HUGS)))

[mamabear]

You took him in, you left your parents home in order to keep him, you taught him love, trust and patience! That is more than most people give humans. Be proud and remember him well. He was your baby and no one can take that away from you EVER. I know this was a shock and you will "what if or OMG if I only did this"......The list can go on and on....Please try not to. I know its easy to say more than it is to do it but please try. Prayers for you and big big hugs for comfort!!!!!

[JUDY S]

Again, thanks for your kind thoughts. It's nice to know someone out there understands my pain. There aren't many here who do. Most who know me have come accept this part of me, but they don't share it. My husband will miss him, but he doesn't hurt like I do. I am trying not to think about what I could have done to keep him with me for just a bit longer, it's hard. I don't regret the frustration I had in the beginning and I don't regret the pain now.

[Tambrey]

Judy, I am so sorry for your loss...

[k9Karen]

We definitely feel your pain. I seriously doubt there is anyone on this board who has read this without a tear (in my case, more than one). I'm so sorry for your loss.

We understand.

[E's]

As Karen says

We definitely feel your pain. I seriously doubt there is anyone on this board who has read this without a tear (in my case, more than one). I'm so sorry for your loss.
We understand

Same goes for me... My wonderful Winnie - German shepherd dog `Eowyn of Colmar - died suddenly, unexpectedly, on 1 February 2006; she was 9 years and 8 months of age... I got her when she was 6 weeks old and then found out the average lifespan of the GSD is shorter than that of smaller breeds - but it did seem I should have got to keep her longer than I did. You and your husband are in my thoughts - I am so sorry about dear Kujo.

Still E's Hobbit in my dreams

[JUDY S]

Thank-you Tambrey, K9Karen and E's. E's I know what you mean. I thought I would still have years with him. I just wasn't ready.

[LisaT]

Im so sorry........