Company

[Karen d]

I have been in tears all day and I had to find something to do with my feelings so I went online and found this board. I appologize fot typos, I can't see well through the tears.

My oldest cat companion, Company, is dying. I've been with her all day, stroking her, holding her and sharing my tears with her. I've been praying all day for her suffering to end and for her to be taken to heaven soon.

I've had her for nearly 20 years and although I know she is old, I still feel guilt, thinking that I should have done more for her to help her live longer. I also know that my guilt is not warranted. But it is still there.

My children were 6 and 8 years old when we got her. Now they are grown with cats of their own. I'm remembering so many happy times with Company and it is hurting to have to say good bye. I've been trying to decide for a week now if i should take her in to the vet to be put down. Not being able to make that decision has resulted in my decision. She always hated the vet with a passion and I want her to be happy and comfortable when she passes - at home in her bed. I don't want her last hours to be in the car, scared, then on a cold table in the vets office. Our vet always put her in a kitty sac to examine her because Company would be so upset just being there. I can't put her through that now.

I believe that prayers are strong and if you feel so inclined please say one for Company.
Karen d.

[Traci]

Karen, I wish I could have been here earlier. Hope not too late. If you truly feel your kitty is in pain, or suffering, please call your vet and ask about a house-call,...many vets are offering these services for owners now.

I understand your pain and uncertainty, believe me. But if she is truly suffering, the kindest act you can do is let your vet give her a peaceful passing.

My heart and prayers are with Company and you....(((HUGS)))

[Cleo]

Karen,

My prayers go out to Company for a peaceful journey to The Bridge. If it's not too late, please take Traci's advice and inquire about a house call. I agree with you that Company would be at better peace home in her own bed and safe, familiar surroundings.

My prayers will continue for your heart to ache less and less with each day that passes after Company is gone. Please find strength in remembering that you gave Company a quality life which helped her to live as long as she has. She's forever greatful to you for it.

Cleo

[Marty]

I am sorry you are having to go through this. My Patches was 18, so I know it is difficult to have loved so long. I hope you can find a Vet to come to your home to make things easier. Hugs.....

[Wanda]

Karen, we are praying for you and Company, please see if your vet will do as Traci suggested. Vet can make it so much easier for your baby, I have been through it with a poodle once and it is so very hard but the suffering is the worse. Just remember the wonderful times and you will always have Company snuggled in your heart. Wanda

[oconnorjoy]

Karen....sending prayers for a peaceful trip to the bridge for Company. I lost my 22 year old cat Susie last March and know how you feel. I ended up having to bring her into the vet but for once she was very calm and let them give her the needle as she burried her head in my shoulder. I know now that it was the kindest thing to do for her but at the time it was the hardest thing I had ever faced. Just remember all the good times you had with her.

[Tambrey]

Karen....prayers taht by now Company has gone on over the bridge peacefully and is resting...

My Tigger was the same way....I had him for about 17 years when he got old...fed him soft foods, he had accidents that I had to clean up...he was soooo very thin...I finally decided to call the vet and make an appointment that if he had not made the decision himself by a certain date, I would take him in...

A Thursday morning, Tigger came to weave between my feet while I was getting ready for work...something he had not done since I found him as a kitten...I picked him up and sat on the edge of the tub, holding him like a baby, looking into his watery eyes, while he layed there looking up into mine...he lifted a paw and touched my cheek...my tears fell on him...
He let my husband gently pet him...something Tigger wa not ever too keen on before...he let my son pick him up and hold him...again something he had never let Clay do before...
Tigger went and ate a few bites of food, we left him laying under his favorite table in the front hall...by the heater vent...later that afternoon when my mother came to check on him, he had gone peacefully...

It was hard...but he made his choice...
Peace be with you...

[Guest]

Thank you all for your kind words and prayers. I live out in the country and the vets only come out for livestock. So a house call wasn't an option for Company.

Notice I said wasn't. I stayed up with Company until 2 am when sleep finally won out. When I awoke this morning she was gone. She died with her eyes open, that made me so sad. I wish I had stayed with her just a few hours more so she wouldn't have felt alone. I've wrapped her in one of my shirts. She loved laying on my clothes. And I'll burry her in her bed. My husband will be home tonight (after a business trip) and he said he will make her a coffin. Even though I knew she was dying I'm still in shock and the tears just wont stop.

I know I will grieve and eventually I'll be ok. But my tears are selfish - because I love her so...but I know that she is no longer in pain and is finally happy healthy and running around like she used to, chasing butterflies and such.

Thanks again, Karen

[Traci]

Karen, I hope you can find some comfort in knowing you gave her so many years of unconditional love, she knew that, and that love will guide her throughout her new journey. The bond you shared will never be broken.

Regardless of the vet not being able to come out for you...you were with Company, she had you close, felt your love and I'm sure if she could have, she would have told you "it's ok, I am ready to go". That release is one of the most difficult things a human being can accept, but it is a testament of your love for her.

My heart and prayers are with you...

[Marty]

I am so sorry, Karen. We all share your tears.....it is good that your husband will soon be home. Mine was away when I had to make the decision about Patches, too, and that makes it twice as hard. I love the name...I have a mental vision of you finding that the cat was a lot of company, and deciding to name her that! My prayers are with you.