Zoey

[Shannon's Mom]

I can't help it. If I had checked her weight more I would have known something wasn't right. My niece said she was always thin and I thought that was the norm. I keep thinking if we found it earlier she would have a chance but nothing I read said it is curable even with chemo. My vet said she didn't think Zoey was strong enough to survive surgery and that the cancer most likely has spread. I am having a phone consult with an oncologist Wed to see what our options are at this point but after losing Noodles to the same thing, I am not hopeful. There are great risks to anything and I don't see where they survive any longer anyway. I can't even look into her eyes or at her sweet, little face and not burst into tears. Maybe I am too old to have gotten more pets. I really dropped the ball this time. Each one hurts more than the last. My niece was so happy she was here with me and look what I have done!

[slvrwhispr]

Peg, stop.

You can mourn her sickness and that's fine, that's healthy -- you love her, so you must mourn.

But in NO way was this your fault. I didn't recognize Emmy's leukemia until she was past the point of no return, and I loved on that critter every single day. I bet myself up at first, but in hindsight now, the only clue was that she was sleeping in the hallway instead of my bed, and that wasn't even that far out of the ordinary. Same as with Zoey. There was one clue, and it wasn't at all obvious. So, stop. You are a good pet owner. You are a good person. No one in the entire universe blames you. You did not cause cancer.

The only responsibility you have now is to love on Zoey as long as she's around, and DON'T forget to celebrate the time you have together. She's still here, so go love on her and stop beating yourself up. She still needs you. We're here to support you. Just love her, and love yourself. I know you can do that.

[Tina B and crew]

Peg, slvrwhspr is right. We don't always know these things. Cats are masters at hiding things that are wrong with them. Just love her. You have given her a good life, even if it was only for a short time with you. Just love her and hold her and tell her how much she means to you. Blaming yourself solves nothing. ((((hugs))))

[Traci]

Peg, most cancers slowly creep up, we can't always detect them early and you could not have prevented it - the treatment would have been the same even if caught earlier.

See what the oncologist has to say and keep us updated. Know that Zoey and you are in our hearts, thoughts and prayers, always, please hang in there and give Zoey tons of hugs and kisses for us.

[Shannon's Mom]

Thank you all for the kind words. They mean so much. This is the hardest part of pet ownership. But I wouldn't trade the love I have had from all my pets and each one has a place in my heart forever. For the short time she was here, Zoey found her way into my heart and she will always be my beautiful baby girl. Please say a prayer for Pumpkin too because he found a true friend and playmate in Zoey and I know he will be lost without her when her time comes. Thank you all so much for being there. You are treasures.

[Traci]

Zoey and Pumpkin both are in our thoughts and prayers. Please think good healing thoughts, and know we're all here pulling for her!

[Shannon's Mom]

I am sorry to hear about Zoey's diagnosis. Please know you are in my thoughts. I just went through a round of chemo with our Doc so if this is an option and you want to chat just let me know. Hang in there...sending lots of love and snuzzles to Zoey and hugs to you.

We just got home from the hospital in PA and the diagnosis was the same.
They agree Zoë most likely has Lymphoma. They want to do bloodwork and an ultrasound with a
needle biopsy to determine what kind and treatment options. This will be
about $600. They think she might have low-cell lymphoma which would allow
her to go on a chemo plan for life and that would be $2-3,000. Low cell can
go into remission for as much as a year or two but there are never any
guarantees. She could be found to have high grade lymphoma and that is not so great a prognosis.

Her weight today was 7.5 lbs surprisingly enough since last week
the vet said she had lost weight and was 6.14 lbs. That's a large
difference in her weight in one week! Could be somebody's scale is off.

But... the news is about the same. Without the treatments, She may have as
little as two months to four months to go before she gets really sick. This
morning she was out and about and even in the bathroom with me licking my
feet. Now, she is mad and back under the bed! So my predicament is:
Do I gamble all that money I don't have for a little more time or let nature
take its course and let her go? I hate those decisions and there are no
guarantees. Why do things have to be so expensive?

[Cleo]

Peg,

Your last post was reading as a quote from Tina so I edited it.

My prayers are with you and everyone who suffers with the decision of what to do, with all who get the bad news that our babies are sick and with the furbabies themselves. I know it's a tough decision and I myself would move heaven and earth to find the money for treatment but in the end and above all, would only do what would make my baby comfortable if her time left with me was ultimately going to be short.

[Traci]

Do you mean a university hospital?

If so, sometimes the costs are cheaper if your primary vet administers the chemo. It would be worth it to find out about that if if could reduce costs. You could still utilize the ultrasound and biopsy at the university hospital but chemo admin could be done by your own vet. Just another option to consider.

For me, it would be worth the costs if remission were possible. The only thing is, we cannot predict remission, so we treat for that goal. Also, payment arrangements might be possible with your vet? Some university hospitals also help with payment arrangements, that's something you could talk to them about.

I understand the costs and I wish I had the answers for why everything is so expensive. With the economy the way it is, everyone, including vets, are raising costs, it seems the consumer is getting the brunt of everything. I would at least find out what sort of payment arrangements are doable, and opt for the ultrasound/biopsy so that you know which treatment would be best. I know these decisions are difficult, my heart, thoughts and prayers go out to Zoey and you.

[k9Karen]

You must do what is right for you. It's not fair and, unfortunately, no one ever said life would be. I don't know your situation, and I won't begin to presume. Just make the best decision you can, taking into account all the factors. If you choose not to pursue treatment, I will be on your side and in that event, ask the vet what you can do to be sure she is comfortable.