Clueless about kittens and cats.

[Traci]

I have a question. Why doesn't your GF post?

[Superdude]

I have a question. Why doesn't your GF post?

She is not posting because she is looking at the thread as well as the rest of website and other websites. As I said before, we are researching before we adopt. We don't want to take the plunge in the unknown. The cat is going to live for at 12+ years. It's not like a goldfish or something I can flush down the toliet. I also feel offended that insinuating that my fiance would intentionally hurt the cat. That is why we are asking questions BEFORE we go out and adopt or buy one. We may or may not get one depending upon the requirements on raising a healthy happy cat. If you wish not answer any questions, that is fine with me. However, I do respect everyone's opnion and any help is appreciated.

[Traci]

No one insinusated either of you were going to hurt the cat. But, the "methods" you've mentioned for some things, are not appropriate.

Some cats live to be 20+ years, you should know that.

You need to start over and start thinking in terms of a new cat being a vital part of the family, a member of the family. They are not disposable, they require lots of love, attention, proper care for life. You also have to ask yourself, is this a commitment you want, can handle, and are going to be prepared for? Are you going to be prepared for unexpected emergencies? Health issues? Treating them with appropriate treatment by your vet? Annual health checkups? Keeping vaccinations up to date? If your kitty develops a health condition, will you have funds to treat at all costs? Or, are you going to let mismanagement of funds prevent you from paying the vet for extensive, expensive treatment? If your kitty develops FLUTD, or any other long-term health condition, will you be prepared to support him/her with life-long required treatment? Just a few examples you need to be prepared for. Are you going to keep kitty safe and INDOORS only?

The site here has alot of information for you to browse and familiarize yourself with common and not-so-common things. (the site, not the forum), but best bets are reading books, visiting a shelter or rescue org, interacting with cats long before you think about adopting one, etc. Don't rely on internet advice, much of what you find on the net, particularly regarding health, is not often trustworthy.

[mamabear]

I also have to say that no one suggested that you or she would hurt your kitty if you got one. I commend you both for looking into it. BUT I do stress again that this isn't some "thing" you can just put down stairs and be there for when you have "time".

Traci is right in what she says, you must think of this kitty as your life long friend. My kitty, Tiger lived till she was 15 when I had to take her and bring her to the Vet myself and euthanize her due to Hyperthyroidism complications. I took her body home and sat outside with a kitty that released her bowels in the cage I had her in. I put her in a towel grabbed a beer and sat there drinking it while I cried like a baby with my kitty in my arms. To be honest I dont remember how long I sat there. My husband came home and made a grave for her as I cried. <------THAT Is what we are talking about. That fear that your kitty might get hurt and die, that scare that something is wrong, that anger when someone says something about "not liking cats" and you just look up at them and say well I have one I like her/him , your defenses go up because you will fall so madly in love with your kitty that no one can say anything that will make you see your kitty as being nothing more than perfect.......
When your future wife (hello to her by the way.) is angry with you and walks away so she doesn't throw that frying pan at you.....guess who will be there to help her anger YEP you guessed it...Kitty will be and you will thank your lucky stars that that kitty was there so she can pet and her made all her anger go away....

When you come home before your future wife and you have had a horrible day because some jerk wanted to climb the corporate ladder and used you as a stepping stone and left you in the dust and you wanna sit down and have a beer and crawl under a rock guess who will be there to help you calm down...YEP you're right again (you are getting the hang of this arent' you?) . Your kitty will be your baby, even when you have a baby of your own and its crying and it smells bad and you just want that beautiful baby to shut up, guess who will still be there to comfort you ? YEP your first baby!!!

This is what a book wont tell you. This is what the internet will not say. This is what you need to know. You can have all the money in the world to take care of your kitty and your should do as Traci says , sit down and see if you will have money for emergencies and such things as shots and tests. This is way beyond your heat being on downstairs ....which again I state , kitty should not live a place where it is very cold, very unfair to her. This is going to be a very long journey for all three of you. Your heart will change and your mind will think differently after you take a kitty into your home. AND kittens well they need extra love and attention and they are like toddlers and will get into so much trouble until they mature a little. The antics a kitten will do will put a smile on your face one minute and make you sooooooooo angry with yourself the next for leaving your good socks on the floor that kitten just put a whole in. Your hearts will be stolen by this kitty and it will have you so wrapped around your finger you wont know how to break free and eventually you wont want to be free.

When you have THAT much love for a kitty THEN you will be ready for one. In the meantime ask here and read your books and search for one that you BOTH think would suite your home AND your lifestyle. LIKE you wont want to get a Siamese kitty they are very talkative and need a lot of attention. You wont want a medium or long haired if you fear kitty being all over everything and the hair will be a lot. So keep doing your homework and please make sure that if you both feel you are still not ready for one by summer then just wait. Don't jump into it just because.

***Putting a note here in case people realize that I wrote by kitty had Hyperthyroidism and see that my signature states that I have Graves Disease. Graves Disease is a form of Hyperthyroidism and yes I have it as well as my kitty had it. There is no relation between the two though.***

[Tina B and crew]

So what you are essentially asking about is if it is OK to confine the cat to one story of a multiple story home, correct? I have to admit when I first read your post I too wondered, why would someone want to keep a cat in the basement, because that is how you referred to it:

My fiance' doesn't want the kitten/cat to have the run of the whole house and wants to keep it in the basement.

I can really understand how everyone got the wrong idea because it really sounded like your GF didn't want to bother with the cat. That said, I don't think there is anything wrong with keeping a cat confined to one part of a home, but I also believe you are right when you say that cat may not accept that in its life. Cats are social animals for the most part, they want to be with their family, which in this case means humans. All the cats I have ever had would not tolerate being separated from their humans. So yes, the cat is going to want to come upstairs when you go up for meals, or sleep. It's only fair. And yes, cats can live longer than 15 years. I lost one last year at 17 and currently have one who is 16 but they often make it to 20 or past!! As Traci said, you have to be committed to spend money and time on vet visits etc. We all to often see people come to this board who want to know what they can do for their sick cat because they can't afford a vet visit. We all know that people go through tough times, but keep in mind that you are committing to the complete and thorough care of this animal for a long time. As far as litter boxes go, I scoop them into a plastic bag and throw it into an outside garbage can. It's a daily chore and one you can't overlook. Cat's like clean boxes. You have to be willing to devote daily time to play with them, cuddle with them, talk to them. They need this attention.

I agree that two cats are better than one when you are often gone a lot during the day. That said, it isn't always feasible. I now have only one cat living with us. My 16 yr old stays at my parents next door because we simply do not have room for two cats in our tiny, tiny place. I'm sure some would chastise me for not having a larger place for my cat to run and play (she makes do, believe me..she doesn't hurt for activities during the day), or not having a companion for her since I'm busy with school and my husband with work, but we make do with our life circumstances. Given the opportunity to change my circumstances I would in a heartbeat and I'd do it with my cat in mind. My cats are my kids and that is where they rank in my priorities.

You also have to consider that once you have a pet you can't just take off and go they way you can without them. Vacations have to be planned around finding someone who can come stay with them, or at least visit 2-3 times a day and check on them. So be ready to not be able to say "hey, lets take off for the weekend" because it just won't happen.

It is great that you are at least trying to find out everything that you can before you just go and get a cat. Just make sure you are ready for the full commitment. That said, I believe a cat can bring so much to one's life!! And mamabear is right about how they are there for you no matter what. My Willow hates it when I'm busy with school work and can't play with her, but when I take a break she's always ready to play, forgiving me for sitting for hours at my computer or books working on a paper. I went away for 3 weeks in January and was sure she was going to ignore me when I returned, but she immediately greeted me when I came home and has been my constant companion again since returning. She is there for me when a lot of my human friends aren't!!

[Superdude]

Another Cat question:
My neighbor has a cat. I heard the cat whining the other night in my townhome. I'm worried about getting a cat because of this reason:

One of my friends who had a cat moved into a new condo. The previous owner replaced the carpets and it was found that they owned a cat. When my friend moved in, the cat started pissing on the new carpet and it would not stop. Eventually my friend had to remove the carpet. He found that the floor had old cat urine on the flooring. (It was concrete underneath) He bleached the floor and laid down new carpeting. My friends cat never had anymore problems using the litterbox.

Now, if I get a cat and he/she hears the cat or can smell it. (Cats have a strong sense of smell right?) Will they start marking their turf?

[Cindy]

It's a possibilty. However, my 7 year old male INDOOR cat can see and hear the neighborhood cats outside and he has never felt the need to mark his territory.

[mamabear]

Like Cindy said yes it is possible. There are cats that do that and ones that don't. You don't know which one you will get though. Neutered/spaying does help. You would speak to your vet about the appropriate time for that.

[MA]

Cats don't whine, but dogs do. If you have a stressed kitty that YOU can hear, that will add to the stress of your new cat/kitten in the basement. If the urine wasn't removed effectively with the right type of cleaner, your new cat will find the spot and mark it. He or she will "refresh" it every three days (thereabouts) If it smells like a litter box, they will use it as such.

Cats need two litter pans (three are ideal) A new cat is going to be stressed, he may stop eating, he will be looking for places to put his scent by scratching, so you would need to get adequate cat furniture to allow him to do this, otherwise, Mr Sofa gets sacrificed.

My husband and I live with a lot of cats. They roam the house, they are allowed in all the rooms except our bedroom where we have a special needs kitty who can't jump or climb living. We don't confine them to one room, they pretty much decide what room they want and who they want to hang out with.

I don't want to pass judgement on you and your girlfriend, because you are asking questions before you take the leap. But cats can and do live over 20 years. My outside kitty that I recently lost (he was feral in the full sense of the word) was 23 when he passed. He was a victim of the pet food contamination.

If you go through with your decision to get a cat, I hope you have really thought about what having a cat in your life means. They hate to be ignored, they as a rule love to be underfoot and they like to curl up next to a fire when it is cold. They need annual exams, vaccinations, wormings, daily grooming, their claws trimmed, and monthly flea treatment. It gets expensive sometimes. So be sure both of you are committed to giving this scared kitty the love he/she needs to feel safe, quality food, fresh water daily and adequate litter needs.

If your cat is going to be alone a good portion of the day, you might consider visiting a shelter and getting two cats sharing one cage that get along. Then they will have company when you aren't there. If you get a kitten, be sure you can sacrifice your drapes, abandon all hope of a good night's sleep, and walk carefully at night so you don't squish a paw or tail that happens to scamper past.

[mamabear]

Superdude, excuse me for a moment to say to MA that I am deeply sorry for your loss of your beloved kitty of 23 years. Hugs and prayers to you!